As the Intergenerational Discipleship Coordinator for the Great Plains United Methodist Conference, I’m often asked for intergenerational resources. I typically respond, “What flavor of intergenerational do you mean?” Some want resources for children and youth ministries, others want family faith-at-home resources, and still others want ideas for worship. Here’s a basic primer: what intergenerational ministry is, what it isn’t, and small tweaks to your existing ministries that foster deeper relationships across generations.
At its most basic, intergenerational ministry engages multiple generations at once. As a practitioner, I’d add that good intergenerational ministry happens when generations engage with each other as equals, fully human wherever they are in their development.
- 5 MIN READ
- Key Takeaways
- Why age-specific programs are actually the newer, trendier idea
- The hard question worth asking about your children’s moment
- How small tweaks to what you already do bring generations together
Given that definition, intergenerational ministry is not:
- Kids or youth ministry. We need to fully include our youngest ones, but narrowing intergenerational ministry to kids or youth ministry really just makes it “generational ministry.” Please hear me: there’s nothing wrong with age-specific ministries. They’re crucial! They’re just not what intergenerational means.
- Older generations “pouring into” younger ones. The belief that children are “blank slates” to be written on or “empty cups” to be filled is faulty and harmful to everyone. Intergenerational ministry is a two-way street. I’ve learned so much from people older and younger than me, and I would have missed so much goodness had I written them off because of their birthdate!
- A trendy new program. In the grand scheme of church history, it’s actually age-specific programs that are new and trendy. For most of our tradition, people of all ages gathered side by side; age-specific church programs only rose to prominence after the Industrial Revolution.
Since intergenerational ministry isn’t a new program, you can let out a sigh of relief: most churches already have some intergenerational elements. To become more intentional, take just one small step in your worship services, your existing programming, or your special occasions.
In your worship services:
- Design with accessibility in mind. Consider your oldest and youngest. Can everyone see over the pews? How will you engage non-readers? Have you considered attention spans and body movement at different developmental stages? Do you explain each element of worship so folks of all ages understand why we do what we do? Are there safety concerns in the space?
- Interrogate the children’s moment. Ask the hard question: why do you do it? Does it really engage children, or is it more for the congregation to see young ones up front? If the rest of the service were kid-accessible, would you need it?
- Share responsibilities. Give people of all ages a job! Pair a young greeter with an older one and let them work their magic. Kids can read, pray, light candles, even decorate the altar. My bet is, if young people feel their contribution is vital, they’ll want to be there more.
In your existing programming:
- Mix it up. If you have a meal or coffee hour before age-specific groups or classes, invite folks to sit by someone they don’t know well, with conversation starters on the tables if connecting feels hard.
- Add a spiritual component. Intergenerational moments often happen in transitional times and spaces, so engage the generations in the liminal! Add a hallway prayer station, or send folks out of worship with a question to ask three people of a different generation.
- Tour the ministries. Invite adult small groups to learn with kids or youth one Sunday (or even a whole unit!). Not teach or volunteer. Learn with. Who decided we stop learning through play as adults?!
And during special times:
- Faith milestones. We often celebrate baptisms, third grade Bibles, confirmation, and graduations in worship. What milestones could you lift up for other life stages, like a blessing for recent empty nesters or retirees? And how might parents and guardians play a bigger role in children’s milestones?
- Liturgical seasons. Advent, Christmas, Lent, Easter, and Pentecost are my very favorite times to introduce new ideas. Try one new thing during one season to get generations interacting. And by one new thing, I don’t mean adding another event. I mean tweaking what you’re already doing.
- Service and missions. Serving alongside one another builds lasting relationships. Whether you’re sprucing up the building or serving another community, make these experiences accessible to more ages:
- Schedule work days on weekends or after school and work. It’s tempting to “get it done” on a weekday morning, but we miss out!
- Reserve safe jobs for children, explain them in accessible language, and let kids actually do the job with other generations ready to support.
- Ensure that adults who work with children and vulnerable adults are trained and follow your protection policy. It is of utmost importance that the church stay vigilant in protecting our most vulnerable.
Whichever “flavor” of intergenerational ministry your congregation lands on, the throughline is relationships. It’s not a program or a new budget line item; it’s an incarnational mindset followed by intentional steps to draw the circle wide.
Church is one of the few spaces left that foster interaction between generations. Adults go to work; kids go to school; at practices and games, the young ones perform and the older ones observe. We flock to niche groups in similar life stages, a natural tendency with deep value when we connect with others who understand our circumstances.
However, Jesus shows us time and again that we are so much better together in all our variety: class, gender, race, and yes, age.
Written By:
Melissa Collier Gepford
Intergenerational Discipleship Coordinator of the United Methodist Great Plains Conference
Bio
A graduate of Perkins School of Theology and an ordained deacon, Melissa helps congregations establish healthy discipleship systems and connects church people to the world. She is a writer, speaker, and most recently, the creator of Dandelion Marketplace. Melissa enjoys drinking good coffee, working out, and testing her semi-green thumb. She and her husband Bill enjoy dancing when they can and love playing with their son, Finnegan.